People are not always aware of what a funeral celebrant does. What goes into creating and conducting a non-religious celebration of life ceremony?
When somebody dies, a bereaved family member will contact a funeral officiant to ask her to conduct a ceremony for the deceased. It is better to consult the celebrant before a date for the ceremony is decided on, to ensure that the celebrant is available. The celebrant will know how long she needs to prepare the ceremony.
A non-religious celebrant might also be able to suggest suitable venues as well.
The celebrant then visits the family to interview them about the life of the person who has died. She will have a checklist of questions, in order to be sure to get all the information that is necessary to create a rounded picture of the deceased.
There’s the biographical information about where and when the person was born, where they were educated and the kind of work that they did. We ask about relationships, marriages where appropriate and details about children, if the deceased had any. We also ask about hobbies and interests. Family members tell us about the deceasd’s achievements.
But we also ask about what the bereaved learnt from the deceased and what they will miss about them.
Music and readings
The family will tell the celebrant if the deceased had stated what they want for the funeral. There might be particular songs or pieces of music or readings that they had specified.
It is important to discuss the music in some detail, as the family might not know what helps to create a sense of occasion.
There is usually music playing while people are arriving. The celebrant might suggest that some music be played round about the middle of the service, to give time for reflection about the deceased. Some mourners use this time to pray. Then there will be music at the end, to draw the ceremony to a close.
The celebrant needs to find out who will be in charge of playing the music
If there are no requests from the deceased, the celebrant can suggest readings. Some take some examples with them, as people don’t always know the possibilities for a non-religious funeral.
Sometimes the readings can refer to the deceased’s hobbies or interests. They might also be light hearted or even funny.
The celebrant will find out if there will be other speakers and if someone else is delivering a eulogy. She will get the contact details of the other readers, so that she can liaise with them.
Then the celebrant goes home to write the ceremony. The length of time it takes to create a ceremony varies from officiant to officiant, as well as the complexity of the ceremony.
We tell the story of the person’s life and we describe what kind of person they were. We tell about their relationships with other people and the effect they had on others.
The celebrant might have to limit the ceremony to a certain length. If the ceremony is going to be at a crematorium, for example, there might be a time slot allocated of forty minutes or an hour.
The celebrant will send the first draft of the ceremony to the contact member of the family for checking.
On the day of the ceremony
On the day of the ceremony, the celebrant will arrive in good time – at least half an hour before it is due to begin. If there is a sound system, she will do a sound check.
She then conducts the ceremony.
It is usually a good idea to stay for refreshments afterwards, if they are offered at the venue. People might want to discuss the ceremony or get contact details from the celebrant.
To read more about funeral related matters go to the Wordways Ceremonies website.